in case of emergency
lately ive been thinking about what i would do in the case of an emergency. i live alone and all my family lives in another state. i wonder if i was injured, got violently ill or was murdered to death, how long it would take for someone to notice.
i realize that i put myself in this position kind of. i lost a friend to suicide a couple years ago and since then i've isolated myself from everyone else. i didn't have too many friends to start with, mostly coworkers, but i stopped responding to their efforts to reach out to me.
im sure it all sounds very pathetic or sad but i've been more at peace since. there's no more pressure to make or keep plans that i would inevitably flake on and feel guilty about. now its just me and whatever plans i make for and with myself. there's no more of that impending doom feeling i had at all times, hoping i wouldn't be asked to hang out. i don't mind being alone, i don't feel lonely.
anyway, the logistics of that makes it complicated. i know my mom worries about me all the time already and if i dont participate in the family group chat regularly she calls me and makes sure im ok. so i know at some point she would know something was wrong. i guess my concern isn't all that serious, i think i'll be ok for the most part. but i do worry about my appendix bursting some day and how i'd deal with that.